Nu? So what's my problem?

Elizabeth has ulcerative colitis, has recovered from several flavors of cancer, and may be starting lymphoma again.

Her husband is comatose in the ICU, tentatively diagnosed with Creutzfeldt-Jakob after months of increasingly demented activities (including actions that have put both Elizabeth and his mother in financial danger).

Cindy had a huge cancer removed from her uterus, and is starting to lose her hair from chemo.

As for me... I'm depressed.

I have a whole house and a lovely yard (with flowers and a veggie garden) all to myself. I have a shy cat who loves me. I successfully made yogurt and bread yesterday, and attended a meeting at MIT (where Jim sought me out, stayed beside me & helped me, and accompanied me to my car, where he kissed me, when I left). I rode my trike to the gym, where I had a good work-out... and the NMSS sent me another check to encourage me to continue what I've been doing at the gym...

It's going to be very hot today, but my house is still cool because it's so shady here. If it does get hot, I'll drive (in my air-conditioned car) to the library, where I'll pick up the audio-books that are waiting for me... and I'll bring my laptop, in case I can work there. Oh - and maybe I'll try the local computer-help store to see if they can fix my external disks... if they can't, I have the NMSS check that can help me buy a new back-up disk...

But I'm depressed. I'm scared. I'm lonely. I don't like this symptom of mild palpitations: they have no cause, and they feel like fear.

Well, I'll keep trying to ignore them. I'm tired of enriching doctors.